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It’s Loose Change, Expect To Get Hit

By | Community Relationships, Family, Friends & Companionships, Making Change | No Comments

There is no guide book for living as a parent AND you are inevitably growing and evolving, likely at slightly differing times to even your parenting partner. When the tides of change are let loose, expect a storm to follow.

Change can be a problem, sometimes a MAJOR PROBLEM.

As by products of our advancement forward in our health, fitness, and energy levels, we can expect to catch flak from friends, family, coworkers, and basically anyone who knew us BEFORE we changed.

The change can be a change in how you view the sanctity and safety of childbirth, OR a change what foods you find work best for you, OR a change in the awareness of how your actions effect the plants and animals, OR a change in what level of fitness you find acceptable for yourself.

The change can happen out of the blue, it can be overnight, or it can take years to develop. Though one thing is ever constant with change; agitation. Just as when a stone is thrown into a calm pond, ripples occur, and ever as surely, the ripples abate. A new homeostasis establishes. Peace returns. Remember this truth as you grow and change.

You will certainly be doing some things differently than your parents and grandparents did. You will likely decide to do some things differently than your mother and father and law believe is best. Your neighbors will adamantly propose that their style of living is the healthiest. Your friends will think you are being too extreme. Your doctor will say “Do it my way.” The magazine will say, “Do it her way.” The book will say, “Do it his way.”

At the end of the line is you. YOU HAVE ALL THE POWER. You are responsible, even if you choose to follow someone else’s opinion or advice.

Woo Hoo! I’ve got the power!

But wait!
With great power, comes great responsibility.

If you are new to being a parent, or are new to choosing your own path, get used to confronting the paper tigers all around you. Don’t make them into big, blown out confrontations. Simply state your truth, state why you hold it as your truth, and let that be that. You know what you know, now live what you know. No apologies required. You are doing your best, right?

And believe it or not, much of the backlash we receive, when we change, comes from genuine love and genuine fear of the unknown.

Make your truth accessible to those who are lovingly desiring to be a part of this new dimension of your life. Be patient, as we each see certain truths at certain times. Be true to yourself and your experience of truth and life.

How To Instantly Kill A Conversation with Two 4-Letter Words

By | Community Relationships, Friends & Companionships, Gratitude | No Comments

How are you doing?

If you answered, “fine” or “good”, as is so currently common, you are in grave danger of missing the boat. We effectively kill the life of the conversation when we use the words “fine” or “good” to describe our experience of life. Subconsciously, we are also shorting ourselves on how much of life we do experience. As Tony Robbins eloquently puts it, “the words that we attach to our experience become our experience.”

1 in 10 Americans are on anti-depressants.

1 in 3 Americans feel dissatisfied with their lives.

You and I, WE, are ALIVE!

We have the opportunity to experience tastes, sounds, sights, textures, emotions, relationships, mental and spiritual phenomena.

“Suddenly you’re ripped into being alive. And life is pain, and life is suffering, and life is horror, but my god you’re alive and its spectacular.”

— Joseph Cambell

There may be moments of pain, suffering, horror, but most of life is benign, AND the majority of our pain, especially in the first world countries, is self-inflicted pain. Whether it is the physical pain induced by unhealthy lifestyle choices or the mental anguish incited by unchecked emotions and rampant destructive thought patterns; these pains can be ameliorated or avoided entirely by us.

1:400,000,000,000

Those are the odds that you would be born, with your DNA, in that spot on Earth, to your parents, out of all those sperm, with that one egg. These are just the odds for our birth. What are the odds are that you would not only be born, but survive childhood, make it into adulthood, have a computer or device, and read this article?

Exceptionally slim. BUT, life happened. Life is happening.

Life is ripe with opportunity to find joy, peace, wonder, awe, creative expression, intimate connection, and virtually endless experiences. Take this opportunity to change your language and change your experience of life.

Anytime I am asked the question, “How are you?”, I take the opportunity to reflect on my experience of life. When I do this, I feel grateful. This gratitude for being alive with the capacity to respond, elicits a joyous answer from me. “I doing fantastic! I’m alive!”

Here are some of my favorite answers to the age old question, “How are you?”
‘Stupendous’, ‘splendid’, ‘This is the best moment of my life’, ‘Amazing’, ‘Wonderful’ I’ve even tossed in ‘splendiferous’ on occasion. (Don’t worry if you can’t find it in every dictionary, ‘splendiferous’ is a word.) Consciously come up with some default responses of your own, so that each time someone asks about how you are doing, you will have the chance to experience an uplifting moment in your day.

If you want a more thorough kick in the butt, so that you can get back to enjoying the thrill of life, watch Mel Robbins in this TED talk. I highly recommend it.

Oh, Really? This Popular Saying Gets An Overhaul

By | Community Relationships, Friends & Companionships, Quotes, Responsibility | No Comments

“Everything in Moderation”

It is the motto of the underachiever, the credo of the consistent consumer, the epitome of mediocrity, AND it is violent, unhealthy, and downright dangerous.

One method I use to ensure I am not being too gullible when it comes to new information or ideas, is to follow the line of logic being proposed to its extremes. Let’s apply this method to the generally revered maxim, “Everything in moderation.”

Usually, we hear this adage tossed about when someone is about to have a drink, or light just one cigarette, or have just one piece of pie, or… But we will take it to the extreme and suss out the truth. How about drinking rat poison? Would moderation be alright? How about child abuse? Would just a little bit be OK? And rape? Theft? Cheating?

We don’t have to go far down the line of extremes to realize that we don’t want ANY negatives heaped onto our lives, even in the smallest doses. Well, the same is true for our bodies, our minds, and our spirits. They don’t benefit a lick from being subjected to mild, light, or moderate amounts of abuse. Our children don’t benefit from moderate abuse of any sort, neither do our spouses, friends, and coworkers.

We do thrive upon moderate exposure and engagement with positive, beneficial aspects of life; i.e. sunlight, proper food, water, sleep and rest, social engagement, meditative time, pursuit of goals, etc. Too much of these healthy elements and even they can inflict harm; i.e. sunburn, obesity, introversion, extroversion, etc.

The corrected axiom now reads thus: All good things in moderation.

 

 

Someone Has To Do It First

By | Community Relationships, Friends & Companionships, Inspiration & Purpose, Responsibility | No Comments

In every family, there is someone who is courageous enough to break the mold and dare to stretch out for a new foothold.

Even if your family doesn’t fully see the same truth that you see, tread not from your path. Be the beacon of light. If what you have found works well enough, people will follow. You can trust me here, trying to force feed ‘the truth’ down family members throats DOES NOT work. Patience and a consistent example speak volumes and allow the other members of our families to find the truth we so desperately want them to benefit from on their own accord. And when they discover it for themselves, they own it.

No ill feelings, no coercion, just simple steady persistence on your own path and an ever willingness to offer support (or prepare meals) will do wonders for the family dynamic in the long run.

Be the one to shine the light. Be bold. Live passionately. Parent phenomenally. This is the quintessence of High Energy Parenting.